My name is “B”. Through 2.7 years, I was together with a girl who I will call “M”, who is now my ex-girlfriend. I am keeping this anonymous to protect both of us. When we got together, I was in my early 20s, and she was 15. We, in our infinite wisdom, thought that we could beat the odds. We were convinced that it was possible to make an underage relationship work all the way to old age. In hindsight, that is an extremely hard task to successfully achieve. I thought that for the sake of cataloging my experiences and my revelations, I would write a fairly anonymous post about my underage relationship, how things progressed, and where things went wrong. Why? So others don’t make the same mistakes I made.
There are numerous divides in an underage relationship. Firstly, the party that is older than 18 tends to be more independent, less needy, more enabled to do things. This is due to having a car or being able to take public transportation without a chaperone, money to go out and do things due to having a job, and key world experiences that aren’t accessible to a minor. The underage party, in contrast, will be tied down by definite obligations like school, chores, the inability to leave home, the inability to stay out past a curfew, and other people thinking for them. It basically comes down to the inability to contribute much beyond feelings to the relationship. A normal stable relationship between two people focuses on both parties doing their emotional and physical parts to keep things fresh, interesting, and sustained. Since the relationship I had did not have these sorts of necessary contributions from M, I can tell you that it is almost impossible for someone underage to contribute while still technically living under the wing of their parent (or parents).
THIS IS REALLY LONG, CLOCKING IN AT ALMOST 10k WORDS. Make sure you have time to read it all the way through. It’d make me happy if you did. I even hope that M reads it, eventually. While I also hope she doesn’t get mad over the contents, this is my story from my perspective. She can spend the time to write her own story if she wants. She is a good writer, far above her peers, so that might be nice. Or she can bring any complaints to me directly :P But I’m posting this for my sake, and for everyone else who can benefit from my experience. I won’t hesitate.
